The Path to Feeling Free
The Doom Loop™ -> The Separate Self Paradox -> U-Turn -> The Waiting Room (The Loop of Faith™ -> Untethering -> Throw It To The U™)
Freedom unfolds through a series of shifts in how we relate to the unknown.
The Separate Self Paradox
As I mentioned on the Doom Loop™ page, it didn't seem to be enough to merely transcend the Doom Loop™. There was a lot of resistance to letting go of those core beliefs and the core pain associated with it.
It's not only that link between the moment something moves beyond your control and the core pain, that is the problem. A protective identity formed around the doom, that is completely unwilling to surrender control.
And because letting go of the core belief would mean surrendering to the moment something moves beyond your control...that's a problem to the separate self.
The Separate Self
When I looked at all of the beliefs that were uncovered, something became really clear. All these beliefs couldn't exist if the person believing them didn't ALSO believe they were fundamentally separate.
Separate from God or the Universe. Separate from everything they want and desire. Separate from others. And even separate from their body and their "higher self".
That's when Intellectual Control takes over.
This is more than just escape behavior. Fixing everything with cognition becomes part of who you are.
I've had so many clients tell me they can regulate their nervous system, or lose themselves in meditation, but when push comes to shove, the intellect takes over and it won't let go.
One of my clients had the realization that in all the work that she had done - somatic experiencing, meditation, yoga, etc - she had always done that work from a place of control. That was the moment things finally started to shift for her.
The Paradox
When I looked at all of the beliefs that were uncovered, something became really clear. All these beliefs couldn't exist if the person believing them didn't ALSO believe they were fundamentally separate.
Separate from God or the Universe. Separate from everything they want and desire. Separate from others. And even separate from their body and their "higher self". And whatever they feel separate from, is hostile.
This isn't about their conscious beliefs around God, The Universe or Source energy. This about the embodied experience of these concepts when something moves beyond their control.
Most people have tried their entire lives to change, to heal, not realizing they were inside of this paradigm. And what happens is that you want to change, but something in you won't let you.
It's a wanting and stopping at the same time.
Part of you fighting to break free from the pattern whilst at the same time there's a governor on how freely you get to live your life. On how much abundance you can embody. How much success you'll let in.
A way home: Separating From The Separate Self
Ultimately, there are two steps that will bring you home to your self. Your essence.
The first step is neutralizing that U-moment. When it is meaningless, it's just "out of your hands", the body no longer needs to contract around it.
Step 2 is about separating from the separate self and realizing that the concepts and beliefs aren't true and that it's not you. Well, actually, it's more than realizing this. It's fully embodying this.
That's when you can start to make a U-turn.
Love, Femke